One of the things we talk about in the great “SYSTEM” Webinar, is when your relationship should begin with a patient. So many people get this wrong. They think it begins only if they become a patient, but it really begins the first time you meet them. It is just like developing any relationship with anyone you meet.
We even have a short video excerpt you and can watch on the subject:
First you have the attraction. This is where they are attracted to what you said when they heard you at your lecture or presentation. Then you start courting them with regular things of value they want. Not flowers, but Health and Lifestyle Tips, HealthNews, those kinds of things. Then you ask them on the first date, by offering them something like a one on one with you to talk about their problems their goals. Just like many first dates, you need some follow up, more dates, more Tips, you need to work it. Not everyone is going to fall in love with you on the first date, and in fact sometimes that isn’t a good thing.
As they get more comfortable with you, and they have some confidence in you, then it is easier to ask them to move in. Give them the tour of the apartment, tell them what you do. Please though, don’t show them the bedroom the first time they come over. Show them the kitchen first, sit down with them in the living room, get to know what they want from the relationship. Most people want to know three things before they commit. Do you who I am and what my needs are? Do you think this relationship will be good for me? And the last thing, have you been in any other relationships with someone just like me that really worked out well?
Now here is the important part (frankly I think all of it is important). Do not give them a choice of moving in or not moving in because some will say no. Give them a choice between moving in on a trail basis; like a month or two to see how it works out, or choice 2, moving all their stuff in with the advantage of making the place theirs. Make sure you explain the difference. If they go for the trial, sure it is less expensive but it is temporary and then they find they have to keep moving in and moving out. So that quick solution is probably not the ideal. But if they choose to move in, then we are talking about doing some decorating. They can make the move a lifestyle change and although it may appear a little more expensive in time and money, once they are in they can enjoy the fruits of their labor. Given those choices, they are no longer thinking should I move in or not, they are thinking should I do the trial or should I just move in altogether.
Does the relationship ever end? Unfortunately, unless you work at it and they are willing to work at it, some relationships do end, but it could go on for years. Sure you have to do a little retesting now and again, find out if they need to change to keep the relationship going, but in the end it is worth it. Of course, we don’t live in a perfect world and so relationships can end in divorce. Do you know the most common reason people get divorced? Money issues. That’s right financial problems. So how do you avoid that? Get that out of the way when you discuss moving in.
Like in all relationships, be realistic, sometimes the first dates don’t work out. Not everyone is a perfect match for you. Don’t settle, either they are right for you or not. There are plenty of fish in the sea, so look for those that are your type.
Just remember if you stick with a bad relationship you will pay the price. They will tell everyone you were the reason for the break up, they never blame themselves.
http://marketingpearloftheweek.tv/video/the-relationship-begins and at the end click on it so you can register for the February 11th webinar.
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